One of the biggest woes I’ve had as of late is not having more time. Time to finish work, time to play, time to just relax with a movie or a book. What results is a little bit of time for each, and it usually leaves me unsatisfied with what I “accomplish”, or what I watch/read. Even sleep never feels enough.

Could it be all in the head? After all, if there is indeed not enough time to do anything, then how come things still get done anyway? Albeit late at times, things still fall into place at one point. If we look at things, no matter how much you worry about getting your work done on time, the world still continues to exist. Nothing exceptional, there is still life in the planet (though people die every minute, but that’s another matter.).

So what’s the point of worrying?

Still, presented with this argument (if we can call it one, which it doesn’t seem to be, but anyway) why do I still worry at all?

After absorbing the initial shock and grief, I messaged my sister to buy me another FMCC clothing to commemorate the day. I thought of another polo shirt but what Au was able to buy was more fitting: a black button down short sleeved polo with the obligatory 3 stars and a sun in the left breast. It was only released a week before and not surprisingly supplies are running out as of this time.

This polo belongs to the first batch that was out in the market. Every FMCC supply is limited with very slim chance of making another batch. That’s why no matter how hard you try to find a previous design, it will be very very hard to find.

Thanks to Au for buying me this polo. A surprise from this polo was the included sticker decal of FrancisM.

I have yet to stick it somewhere and I am really eyeing to put it beside the apple.

To commemorate our centennial year…
University of the Philippines

1. Student number?
95-08807/95-04697

2. College?
College of Science, Diliman/same

3. Ano ang course mo?
BS Mathematics, major in Operations Research. Nag graduate degree din ako kaso di ko natapos/same, umabot ng 1st yr PhD Math before I called it quits with UP

4. Did you shift majors/Courses or were you a kicked out of your College?
Muntik na. buti na lang hindi./no

5. Where did you take your entrance examination?
sa UP IS./UP Econ

6. Favorite GE subject? (General Education classes)
Nat Sci 1. First auditorium class. Buong-buo ang math majors kaya nagkakilala kaming lahat. big deal din kasi aircon. pwedeng matulog kasi pinapatay madalas yung ilaw./honestly, none

7. Favorite PE?
Weight Training! first time ako nagbuhat ng weights. I had 2 weight training PE – basic and advanced. Nag-aikido rin ako, scrabble at bowling. I had 5 PE’s. Hehe, taekwondo. i also took tai-chi, jazz, and aerobic dance

8. Where do you hang out to check out the hot babes/dudes?
Of all places, sa CS Library. Nandun madalas si shades./meron ba? sa MMC siguro. minsan dun sa tambayan ng ibang CS orgs. Geeks gusto ko, hindi ‘hot’ dudes.

9. Favorite prof(s)?
Sa math si Sir Nuqui, sa other subjects si Balmeo-sensei./dr. ocampo, the epitome of kindness

10. Least favorite General Education class?
Humanities 1. Mag-isa kasi ako. Yung mga kaklase ko, block sila. Ako lang ang naiba, OP tuloy ako./KAS I and II

11. Did you sign up for Saturday classes?
Yeah! PI. No regrets dahil may allowance pa rin kahit sabado./never, mahal pamasahe mula Laguna!

12. Did you join any field Trips?
Naki-extra lang sa field trip nila Pen nung Geo 11 nila./yes, to Lucena and Batangas lang

13. Were you ever a College Scholar and or a University Scholar?
No. /yes

14. What Organization/Fraternity/Sorority were you a member of?
UP MMC. Mathematics Majors’ Circle./UPMMC tsaka sa CS council

15. Dorm, Boarding house, o Bahay?
Bahay. Lapit lang kami sa Diliman./boarding house. Mapulitika sa Dorms

16. If you had your way, what was your dream course/major?
Gusto ko sana Industrial Engineering. Buti na lang hindi. Hehe/civil engineering. na-akit ako sa physics. ditto, buti na lang hindi ko tinuloy

17. Who did you first meet at U.P?
Si Erwon Bucu at si Gerald Agbay/si Laarni!

18. First play na napanood mo sa UP?
Nakalimutan ko na title. Napilitan lang din kasi requirement sa Comm 2 ata./di ko na maalala. Dami e.

19. Saan ka madalas mag-lunch?
Lutong Bahay! Area 2/oo nga sa LB. pero nung hindi ko pa kasama sila AJ, sa CASAA

20. Masaya ba sa UP?
Duh! Syempre naman!/masaya dahil sa kasamang mga tao. minsan may sense, minsan wala, pero alam mong masaya hehe

21 . Nakasama ka na ba sa rally?
Yeah! Patalsikin si Erap!/yep, pero hindi nung si Erap. tungkol sa student fees sa Film Center. sa loob lang ng campus hehe

22. Ilang beses ka bumoto sa Student Council?
Twice ata. Naalala ko si Argee Guevarra ng New Sense Party. Binoto ko sya./as much as i had to

23. Pinangarap mo rin bang mag-laude nung freshman ka?
Hindi./no

24. Kung di ka UP, anong school ka?
Ateneo or UST./DLSU

Eversince college, me and Pen would trek to Greenhills, SM North or SM Megamall to buy gifts for loved ones and close friends. Pen would have a small notebook full of names with gifts for each. It would take us weeks to complete this task. From listing the lucky names, matching the gifts for them, braving the traffic and the crowd, buying the gifts and down to wrapping and giving them the gifts.

None of that will happen this year. Even with my new found friends here in Singapore, I’ll pass. We’d just celebrate Christmas quietly in Sydney. The only thing that occupies Pen’s list is the menu we’ll be having on Noche Buena.

Ajay and I have been with the habit of making lists and writing things down. It’s both fun and rewarding, coz it gives you a visual of your thoughts, and it makes communication easier and clearer, hence understanding.

I tried for a while not keeping notes of what I do at work, and I realise I get lost quite often, and hence disappointed at myself. I’ve gone back to writing down notes at least to log what I had been doing, and it generates motivation on what I need to do next.

I’d like to know what our leaders are doing about poverty, about hunger — the president, the CEO, the bishop. I like to know how they can encourage our children to dream, to pursue their ambitions, to live out their greater destinies.

… In the depths of my own disappointment and impatient, I have time and again been lifted by a few heroes among us. Some work in government, some lead corporations, and some have red caps and the ring of Peter. Though not nearly enough in number to reverse the evil that dominates the landscape of our lives, they remind us that there is hope. All we have to do is be like them.

—- Jose Ma. Montelibano, INQUIRER.net Last updated 02:05am (Mla time) 11/16/2007

Pinoy ako, at iisipin ko pa din na may pag-asa, nang dahil sa mayroong pa ding nananatili na kabutihan sa ilan. Sana dumami pa ang tulad nila. Malaking bagay kung ikakalat natin ang ugali na nagpapalaganap ng PAG-ASA, kaysa puro negatibo [maski ako ay 'guilty' dito] at reklamo na lang. Lunukin na lang ang negatibo, subukang gawing positibo. Kung nahihirapan pigilan, magreklamo lang ng isang beses. Tapos tama na. Wag nang tuluyang apak-apakan pa. Kawawa na nga Pinas, tatadyakan mo pa.

Isang layunin na umahon, na may positibong ugali. Kung ang bawat isa sa atin ay may iisang layunin na iangat ang ating mga sarili mula sa hukay ng hikahos, makakaahon din tayo. Tunog ‘self-righteous’? Inaamin ko naman na ‘apathetic’ na ako kadalasan pagdating sa problema ng Pilipinas. Mahirap magbago. Pero sa tingin ko, mahalagang ibahin natin ang ugali natin patungkol sa bansa natin. Ang kagandahan naman sa situasyon na ito, ay nasa ‘nature’ naman ng Pinoy ang maging positibo. Kelangan lang buhayin ang ugaling ito, at panatilihin. Naisilid lang ng husto ang ugaling ito dala ng bugnot ng mga masasamang balita. Isang pang challenge sa atin pati ang pananatili ng ugaling may pag-asa maski na makakita ng mga masamang balita sa Pinoy news. Labanan lang natin ang ‘urge’ na magreklamo. Ipakita na lang natin suporta sa isa’t isa kesa maghanap pa ng sisisihin.

Maski sino ka man, nasaan ka man, kung ikaw ay Pinoy, dala mo ang bandila ng bansa, gustuhin mo man o hindi. Kaya kung paano mo sagutin ang mga tanong tungkol sa Pilipinas, dun nila makikita ang klase ng tao at bansa meron tayo. Meron pa din bang ‘Love of Country’ sa report card ngayon ng mga mag-aaral sa Pinas? Hehe, hindi ko alam kung tama na sinusukat ang mga values sa report card, pero ibang usapan na yun. Mareklamo man ako tungkol sa pagka-mapulitika ng mga ‘lider’ natin, di ko pa rin maalis sa akin ang pag-ibig sa Pilipinas. Our recent history sucks, and maybe so does the not-so-recent history but then again that’s another story. Nagagalit ako kapag binabastos tayo. Sure, the balut is revolting, but when someone continues on to say that “Asians are disgusting because of their food, ergo, Pinoys are disgusting too” I would not let them get away with that without a “You don’t shower enough so you stink like wet socks” retort. Let alone if a fellow Pinoy tramples on their own kind!? Sino pa ang magtutulungan kung di tayo-tayo din?

I would say though that it’s a form of strategy to get more traffic to the originators’ site. Unlike in the real world, traffic in websites is a good thing. I thought long and hard if I will give in to this maelstrom. Hmmmm….

Heck, why not. Nothing to lose here.

1. I’m always proud to say that I am the eldest in the brood of 5 and the only guy at that. There was a time when suitors of my sisters were afraid of me. With my hulking figure and all, I do not have to do anything to scare them. I think it’s not the case anymore.

2. Surprisingly, many friends that I’ve known post-UP days don’t know that I also taught at UP. Their eyes would widen in disbelief that I taught at UP. Ikaw?! is the often expression they would give me. Their eyes would widen more when they learn that I taught Math at UP. It’s my secret combo move. haha.

3. I’m a sleep person. 9pm pa lang, lowbatt na. I can’t stay up late everytime there’s a gathering. If I don’t get enough sleep, I can’t function the following day properly.

4. I love playing video games (me and Pen in fact!) – PC games, PS2 and PSP are the platforms that I have tried in the recent years. I may not be a hard core gamer, but I would say that I am able to keep up with the latest games. I’m playing NBA Live ’08 in my PSP now.

5. I was into buying comic books before. I stopped buying when I learned that latest issues are freely downloadable if one knows where to look. I am still reading comics now but not that addicted anymore. I think I’m passed that stage.

6. I never owned a Levi’s jeans. Not one pair of Levi’s jeans. I don’t know, it’s just that I’m better off with other brands of jeans.

7. I wear my wristwatch in my right hand and I’m not a lefty. When I was in high school, I just thought that why not wear my wristwatch in my right hand instead? So I started wearing it on my right. Up until now, it stays in my right hand.

Wow. It took some time to make that list. Thanks to Joy for this meme. Made me realize my personality too.

I’m supposed to tag 10 people. The chain letter stops here. If you want to do it, be my guest. Drop me a comment so I would know okay?

I had fun, maybe you’ll have fun doing a list too. Thanks for the tag Joy.
===================================

I thought about doing this list but was just too lazy… and the fact that this person Joy was addressing AJ and not me. Anyhow, since AJ did it, may as well… But since I don’t have enough time to think this through, it may not come out as a good piece on 7 truths, but basically just 7 truths off the top of my head.

[I realise that some of these also qualify as being 7 proofs that I'm too geeky]

1. Things I love to do. Watching movies [and good TV shows!] has got to be on top of my list of favorite things to do. If I could only get paid to do this every day for the rest of my life, I would so love it! One fantasy I have is to have a mini-theater at home with the perfect seats and all the nachos and popcorn one could eat! A close seoncd would be playing videogames and just plain surfing the net.

2. Things I wish I didn’t have to do. I know I have to work out, seeing how much I love to eat and how immobile most of us are during the day [darn computer work!]. So however I dislike having to rise up early to do some yoga or go for a quick run, I haaaaave to. But let me just say, the hard part is the beginning when you have to tell yourself you need to do it, but when I’m already doing a yoga pose or have gone a block of running, it actually feels good =)

3. Things I love to eat. Junk food used to rule my life in UP. Since I left UP, the craving died down for some reason. But still, I can’t live without my occasional milk chocolate and potato chips. I am not a big fan of corn chips, but that salty kind ‘Tomi’ back home is too addicting. Keep them away!

4. Things I love to smell. I so love the smell of brewing coffee, frying bacon and browning garlic.

5. A forgetten ‘talent’. The first piece I would play on guitar [though not perfectly] is always Blackbird (Beatles). It has got to be the easiest plucking piece there is to learn and play (and never forget!). I learned quite a few pieces when I was in grade school, but without practice I can’t play much unless it’s with a SONG HITS book [hehe, typical PinoY!]

6. A peculiar habit. I can read katakana, hiragana and some kanji. Most of my batchmates in UP took Japanese classes [even AJ did] and they probably can too. I was exposed to Nippongo from childhood, because of Japanese family members related to us by marriage. It surprises people sometimes that I read labels in Japanese groceries. [I don't mean to, it is just fascinating to read romaji of Nu-tu-ri-shyo-n fu-a-ku-to-su (Nutrition facts) --- I just made that up now hehe] However, I can’t understand much since my vocabulary is too narrow.

7. The snobby wallflower. I am terrible at socialising, mainly because I find being put into a room full of people very daunting. I know that if I try, I would just look like I am trying too hard, when in fact I’m not. This is why most of the time I would just listen and not talk too much. I am not very fond of talking when it’s “small talk”. I guess this also ties with the truth that I’m not fond of big gatherings. [Interestingly enough, I don't find conferences and seminars too daunting, but more exciting.]

Life goes on.

From the first time I made the trip to the cemetery, it made me wonder why people would have to go at the same time on the same place and just kill time with the dearly departed. It would have been easier if there’s a scheduling involved somewhere so that massive traffic (both car traffic and people traffic) can be avoided.

So what do we have instead? People density shoot up within the cemetery vicinity. People partying, kids running around, people shoving each other, pick pockets, gamblers, beers around, rolling of candle wax to candle balls, while some do actually pray.

It’s one of those holidays that we can live without.

Don’t get me wrong, I do miss our departed relatives and friends but I will have to pass the exaggerated holiday.

That strip above is just all too true for me at the moment. I’m working on 2 papers at the moment… and it is a bit of a hurdle…